Girlhood: Journey into Well-Being

by dr. terri

Girlhood rocks! Or does it? For the most part, our society advocates that well-being for all children starts with them being healthy physically and psychologically. However, this is not merely based on the absence of physical or mental illnesses. Rather, it is a concerted effort on the part of adults who promote children’s strengths by cultivating their talents, positive relationships, moral values, and intellectual capacities. But as some of us can attest, concerted efforts are not always afforded to every child. Undoubtedly, many go without the time and attention they so desperately need to become physically and psychologically healthy individuals.

As we journey into well-being, we as women must start our stories at the beginning. We must start with our girlhood. So take a moment to think back to being a child—the days of being a young girl with pigtails and Ebony Jr. afro-puffs. Were you a daddy’s little girl, a tomboy, a nerd, or a fast Miss Thang? Were you adored, ignored, bored, or easy to afford? The answers to these questions will not only help to identify the labels we internally accepted or rejected about ourselves but they can help us to identify the attitudes we externally projected onto those around us.

Yes, many of us bought into the stereotypes that convinced us we were either the crème de la crème or the least likely to succeed. And all too often, it was the latter which has kept of us from living healthy lives. But listen, if we are going to journey into well-being, we must take some time to go back and get the little girl we left behind—not because we necessarily want to be her again but because she desperately needs to become us alongside us now. It is the only way either one can ever be healthy, happy, and whole.

Well, how do we go back and get her? And what do we do once we find her? Glad you asked. Here’s your discovery assignment: Create a God-Bag. You read that correctly. It’s really simple to make. What you’ll need is a small gift bag, glue, and some art supplies to decorate it. Because the bag will belong to both you and the little girl you left behind, the two of you should decide how you’d like to decorate it.

Once you decorate the bag, find a place where you each can access it whenever you need it. Now when you have something to say to each other (i.e., a story, joke, prayer, apology, reminder, etc.), write it down on a piece of paper—fold it up and drop it in the God-bag. When the other is ready to read it, she can go to it and get it. But here’s the catch. Once either of you reads it, you can choose to respond but whatever you do, you have to put it back in the God-bag. After all, to be truly whole on this journey into well-being, you’ll both have to share it with each other then let go and let God.

The journey continues…

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dr. terri is an educator, empowerment writer, and entrepreneur,

who provides education planning, writing guidance, and life-mapping services to the sisterhood and those they love.

To learn more about her services, visit www.withdrterri.com. For the online women's center, visit www.stillsosexy.com.