Sensuality Defined

by dr. terri

The other day I had a great conversation with a woman who let me know she really enjoys the StillSoSexy! site. I told her how much I appreciate when women hit me up to let me know they are keeping up with the blog posts and reading all the articles on the learn page. And I always get tickled when women whisper that they did a little shopping too. Assuring them of the confidentiality, I tend to whisper back how glad I am to know they found something that made them feel beautiful and sexy.

Yet, as I was enjoying the wonderful conversation with the woman, I realized many of my offline talks with other women are very telling when it comes to our comfort level in openly discussing all things sensual. That is, coming to terms with the essence of sensuality is difficult for many women. After all, most of us have been raised to believe only “loose” women are sensual women. The rest of us, who are “proper” women, are merely sexual spectators—lovers on the low, reproductive magician, dutiful damsels—who morally oblige our mates rather than intimately enjoy them.

Consequently, sensuality has taken on a negative connotation because it somehow implies lewdness, fleshy-ness, or an unchaste lifestyle. But in reality, sensuality at its core refers to what we as human beings experience through our five senses (i.e., what we see, hear, taste, touch, and smell) as well as what we experience through our sixth sense known as intuition. And perhaps, when it comes to sensuality, it is women’s intuition which frightens not only society and our lovers but us.

All this being said, as women, we must ask ourselves what does it mean for us to experience attraction, passion, love, and romance through our senses? What does it mean to be sensually present in our lovemaking? And what does it mean to have all of our senses be very much a part of our love for another human being? The answers to these questions, if answered honestly, will probably lead us to this simple truth: Sensuality is a state of knowing what it is we desire without fear of experiencing it mind, body, and soul. Think on this as you click off your light for the night.

And as always, be well and stay + y'all...

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dr. terri is an educator, empowerment writer, and entrepreneur,

who provides education planning, writing guidance, and life-mapping services to the sisterhood and those they love.

To learn more about her services, visit www.withdrterri.com. For the online women's center, visit www.stillsosexy.com.